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Example: WARN
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Example: BALL
Example: DITCH
Example: DITCH
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  • On meeting a widow, he remarked that it was very sad, “her husband came to a sad end. He was eaten by missionaries.”
  • Calling John Millington Synge’s famous Irish play “The Ploughboy of the Western World.
  • At a wedding: “It is kisstomary to cuss the bride.”
  • “Blushing crow” for “crushing blow.”
  • “The Lord is a shoving leopard” (Loving shepherd).
  • “A well-boiled icicle” for “well-oiled bicycle.”
  • “I have in my bosom a half-warmed fish” (for half-formed wish), supposedly said in a speech to Queen Victoria.
  • A toast to “our queer old dean” instead of to “our dear old Queen.”
  • Upon dropping his hat: “Will nobody pat my hiccup?”
  • “Go and shake a tower” (Go and take a shower).
  • Paying a visit to a college official: “Is the bean dizzy?”
  • “You will leave by the town drain.”
  • When our boys come home from France, we will have the hags flung out.
  • “Such Bulgarians should be vanished…” (Such vulgarians should be banished).
  • Addressing farmers as “ye noble tons of soil”.
  • “You have tasted a whole worm” (to a lazy student).
  • “The weight of rages will press hard upon the employer.”
  • And, the classic: “Mardon me padom, you are occupewing my pie. May I sew you to another sheet?”